Friday, April 17, 2009

Emotional Baggage...

It has occurred to me that I carry some significant emotional baggage. And I gotta say, for the most part, it isn't mine.
I have let go of all of the ridiculous crap that happened to me when I was younger. I have harnessed (for the most part) my willingness to destroy my life with bad choices. Hell, I've even decided not to be a gi-normo-slut just because I can (that was a close one).
But every day, when I step in to my office, I am immediately and utterly cluttered with the emotional baggage of the people around me. I have co-workers who depend on me like a housewife uses Xanax. I am the "mood stabilizer." My stress level rises exponentially over the course of the day because they rely on me to make it all better. Peroxide the scrapes and, with a wisk of my wand of happiness, make that bad boo-boo go away.
It's exhausting. At the end of the day, I am left with very little to give myself or anyone that I love. How do you put on a cheerful voice for your boyfriend when you can't find the energy to get off the couch?
I know that the posts lately seem all doom and gloom, and maybe it's just the damn sunny weather, but really, I can't seem to get the idea out of my head that far, far, far away is a much better place than here.

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