Late Night Poetry

So this is what happens when I can't sleep and I stay up way too late with no caffeine and no sex and no other possible outlet...
Night Sweats
Looking over my shoulder
With its silly, silly sharp teeth
How does a memory
Suddenly grow dentures?
Hideous formed with
Anxiety and riddled
With fears, new and old
It smells of my past
Like a sprinter, I bolt
In terror, but the
Little memory has a
Hold of me
And I fall and fall and
Fall
Topsy-turvy, end over
End
Then land
Face stark white -
Upright
In my bed.

So hard won
My tenous grip on freedom
Like an action hero with one
Finger on the cliff
I cling to the crumbling.

Found a letter from my old friend the other day. This letter is the subject of some other...private e-mails that I looked at (I got permission later).
"Melinda,
It is good to be loved. You too provide me an outlet for my innermost feelings. Thank you for being there through the few years that I have known you. Though we tried to be what we were never meant to be, I think things worked out for the better. You are perhaps my most compassionate friend who never ceases to sparks the compassion within me. Compassion is essential in my line of work.
Many times I have needed your guidance, but you were doing your own thing in your own world. Your remarks are forever in my head. Please keep in touch and don't forget me."

So then I ran across my old dream journal last night when I was, you know, not sleeping, and I had written down the following transcriptions from e-mails sent between my two best friends at the time.

"Melinda was not here to receive your message. I hope you don't mind that I read the e-mail. I am going to read it to her over the phone. I always knew that you talked to Melinda, but I didn't realize that you confided in her as much as I did. I don't know if you realize it, but Melinda has always been very important to me. I wonder how and why it is that she had gained both of our trusts so completely." E-mail sent to my old friend from my ex-friend (Paranoid much? Why did she gain our trusts? Um, why did you give them?)

And the story goes on...
"I appreciate you relaying my message to Melinda. She is a good friend as you probably already know. I don't know why she is and I really don't care. She is one of the things that I do not try to pick apart. I simply accept her." E-mail reply from my old friend to my ex-friend (Yup, I love my old friend no matter what too.)